Many people have trouble being real with themselves and with others because they associate their mistakes and / or faults with guilt and or shame. They may feel that when they admit their mistakes that they are somehow less of a person, that they are inferior and lack worthiness. This could not be farther from the truth, but previous notations from within them may be causing this conflict. For instance, you may have come to feel as if you were not good enough by a parent, a spouse, or perhaps by some demeaning people, and those old negatives still come up and play a part in your life today.
Admitting your mistakes or faults should actually be quite liberating for you. Because when you admit and accept your mistakes, blemishes, shortcomings, and faults you are no longer trying to live up to some unrealistic model of perfection. Whoooo! What a relief it is! The battle of trying to be perfect is one you are going to lose. This does not mean that you lower your standards or that you act with irresponsibility, it simply means that you accept the fact that you are going to make mistakes. When you accept this truth you will stop being so hard on yourself, and by the way, stop having unrealistic expectations of others, (including your spouse). Furthermore, you will learn that by simply realizing your inability to be perfect, that you can forgive yourself for those things that guilt is trying to hold you to in condemnation.
We all miss the boat and end up on the train sometimes, but we keep moving in progression. Life is a constant learning lesson, you know the saying "we learn from our mistakes", right? Well, everyone is going through similar processes in which life often hands us learning curves. It's how we react to those curves that matter. When we stop trying to be perfect and take on humble attitudes our maturity expands. And, with this understanding we begin to look at others differently as well. When we realize and accept that our companions are going through similar processes, we will quit trying to hold them up to some level of perfection in our own eyes.
Your personal strengths are unique unto you, just as your weaknesses are likely to be. Other people in your life, such as your spouse, will be strong in areas that you are not, and weak in areas that you are strong. You are meant to compliment each other, not to pick upon each others weaknesses. This is not to say that there is something wrong with them pointing out those weaknesses, because we all have blind spots in our rear view mirrors that block our insights that we need to know about. It is saying that you point out areas of weakness for growth advancement, and then love those people with their blemishes. It's not to pick on their blemishes as if you do not have any.
Proverbs 17:9 says; He who covers and forgives an offense seeks love, but he who repeats or haps on a matter separates even close friends. It's pretty clear isn't it? Love overlooks mistakes and faults, we are to overlook those mistakes that others make, why are do we not do the same for ourselves? As I already touched on, it's because we are trying to live up to some illusional model of perfection, even as we are stubbing our toe on the door jam. Take a deep breath, and when you exhale let out all those things that you have been feeling shame or guilt about by way of unintentional mistakes. Ask God for his forgiveness, even for intentional mistakes, and then be willing to receive His grace.
As It is said :
While one person hesitates because he feels inferior, the other is busy making mistakes and becoming superior. -Henry C. Link
Laughing at our mistakes can lengthen our own life. Laughing at someone else's can shorten it. -Cullen Hightower
Assert your right to make a few mistakes. If people can't accept your imperfections, that's their fault. -Dr. David M. Burns
The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one. -Elbert Hubbard
Experience is that marvelous thing that enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again. -Franklin P. Jones
When you make a mistake, don't look back at it long. Take the reason of the thing into your mind and then look forward. Mistakes are lessons of wisdom. The past cannot be changed. The future is yet in your power. -Hugh White
Freedom is not worth having if it does not include the freedom to make mistakes. -Mahatma Gandhi
Mistakes, obviously, show us what needs improving. Without mistakes, how would we know what we had to work on? -Peter McWilliams